How God Conquered One Lesbian's Heart

By Michelle D. Smith. Posted by Charisma News on 22 May 2016.

It took me a couple of years before I could work up the courage to go back home for a visit. I wouldn't go alone and took my girlfriend, Ann, and her daughter, with me. My mom was very warm and welcoming, even loving toward all three of us. I thought perhaps things had changed in the nearly seven years I'd been gone.

She pulled me aside and said, "Michelle, I love you, and you are all welcome to stay here tonight, but you'll have to sleep in separate rooms." I was mad, but I understood and appreciated the forewarning. We went to a hotel.

Mom continued to love on us by sending cards and money on birthdays and holidays. I joked it wasn't fair Ann got the same amount of money on her birthday as I did from my parents.

I was beginning to calm down, to live a more stable life, one that wouldn't cause the neighbors to blush. Normal. I thought perhaps I should also pursue a more normal religious identity. I was still seeking God. I knew I couldn't return to mainstream Christianity, just the thought of it still gave me the heebie-jeebies, but I had a deep longing I couldn't satisfy. I was still writing, reading and viewing porn.

I began studying Kabbalah and the Zohar (both Jewish mysticism), and I decided I needed to talk to a rabbi, to learn as much about the foundational aspects of Judaism as possible before I could truly attain proficiency in Jewish mysticism. At the time, this seemed to fall within the realm of "normal" for me. I met with a rabbi in the Reformed tradition, one who assured me it was OK to continue my life as a practicing lesbian.

Although the thought of entering a Christian church or speaking to any of my former mentors and friends who were Christians almost sickened me, I could read the Bible if I was doing it to pursue Jewish knowledge. I stuck to the Old Testament, which kept me safe from the pesky and disturbing writings of Paul. I couldn't deal with Jesus either, but that was OK for now. He seemed safely ensconced in the New Testament.

What I didn't intend during my course of study was to have feelings about God emerge. I began to sense an awareness of Him again. My previous experiences into other forms of spirituality (or non-spirituality) had always been to soothe an ache, but had always been unsuccessful. They were fun, scary, encouraging or wishful, but never fulfilling. I began to pray the serenity prayer and the 23rd Psalm.

More than a year passed as I met with the rabbi once a week, alone and in a small group. I rarely went to synagogue. I am an introvert by nature, and couldn't seem to break into this Jewish family in any meaningful way. Finally, Rabbi M. told me it was time to pick a date for my official conversion ceremony.

Within days of the announcement, I received devastating news. Aunt Jan, dearly beloved and only 11 years older than me, had died unexpectedly. My entire family felt this loss deeply. I drove with my girlfriend to Oklahoma to the funeral.

As I sat in the funeral home chapel, listening to a sermon by a very inexperienced friend of my uncle's, I heard a voice say to me, "You can't give up Jesus." I turned my head to the left and to the right, but no one was looking at me. "You can't give up Jesus." Again, I looked around and no one was paying any attention to me. It repeated again, and perhaps one more time.

I found myself saying, "I can't give up Jesus. I can't give up Jesus." The voice of the minister had faded. I wasn't aware of anything except that thought. I knew to convert to Judaism was to deny Jesus. It turned out I wasn't prepared to do that.

Strangely, even in spite of hearing an audible voice inside my head, I continued to be lost. I searched on the internet for an acceptable church. When I would find a local church that accepted and endorsed the gay lifestyle, I would get excited and go try it out. However, I never went back to any of those churches. It was as if there was a heavy cloud over every single one of them. It was like a giant room lit with only a few 25-watt bulbs. Any church that would accept me as a practicing lesbian lacked all credibility with me. I knew it was wrong, and having someone tell me it was right made me lose all respect for their authority.

I began reading theologians in what is called Progressive Christianity such as Marcus Borg and John Shelby Spong. While their theology was appealing to someone who wanted Jesus without sacrifice, Christ without obedience, I was still hungry. The intellectual spin was interesting, but didn't sound the bell of truth in my spirit. I had experienced a relationship with God when I was a child. I longed to be deeply loved and cherished by Him.

Excerpt from "Prodigal Pursued" by Michelle D. Smith. Former Assistant District Attorney, Michelle spent nearly 25 years as an out, loud, and proud lesbian. A feminist, separatist and anarchist, she wandered through New Age beliefs, witchcraft, Buddhism, agnosticism and all the other "isms" available to explore. At last she encountered the undeniable, indescribable love of Jesus, and everything changed. Today Michelle not only reaches out to touch the LGBT community with the love of God, but also speaks to the church, sharing a message of hope to those who feel they have lost a   loved one to the LGBT lifestyle.

Link: 

http://www.charismanews.com/opinion/57327-how-god-conquered-one-lesbian-s-heart

Finding Real Love

BY CHUA EE CHIEN. Published by Asian Beacon on 28 July 2013.

Edmund Smith is a good-looking pastor, loving husband and father of two children who once led a “wild homosexual lifestyle,” as he says.

Smith had his first gay relationship when he was 18. A pub singer at night and a special education teacher by day, he used to entertain thoughts of having a sex change and tried to behave as femininely as possible. Plucking his eyebrows and shaving the hair on his legs were just two of his many womanly routines. What drove him to this lifestyle and what made him walk away from it?

Confusing Childhood

“I am the fourth boy in my family. When Mum was pregnant with me, they had hoped that I would be a girl. Perhaps that’s why, until I was five, my mother brought me up like a girl. I played with dolls and wore dresses,” says Edmund. “My father rejected me – he never
hugged me or touched me. My rejection deepened especially after my younger sister was born because I could remember clearly my father loving her and saying nice things to her just because she was a girl.”

“So, for the first five years of my life, I remember wishing to be a girl due to all the ‘self issues’ that had developed because of how my parents treated me and my confusing upbringing. I hated being a guy and naturally I began to think, feel and talk like a girl,” he recalls.

“When I reached the age of six and started to go to kindergarten, my mum suddenly decided to stop treating me like a girl after receiving comments from others and she started abusing and beating me up, making me more confused,” he says.

Edmund was later sent to an all-boys school and there he found boys who were just as effeminate. So, at the age of 13, he began his homosexual life.

Triggers

Based on his personal experience, he finds that there are mainly three specific issues which would trigger one’s journey to homosexuality, if not dealt with.

The first is the ‘vacuum’ issue, which is related to a lack of parental love. “Everyone needs the ‘V’ love. A mother’s love flows down from one side, and a father’s love flows down from the other and a child needs both parents’ love. Most gay guys have never had a father’s love,” he says.

The second trigger is the ‘self issue’, which is basically something about ourselves that we reject. For example, if you are a man and you reject your masculinity, that becomes a ‘self issue’ towards your gender.

The third trigger is the ‘barrier issue’, which causes one to look at the opposite gender negatively due to bad experiences such as abuse and bitterness.

Unfortunately for Smith, he had all three issues and therefore, looked for real love among his kind all through his secondary school days, while trying to be as feminine as possible.

Smith had his first real relationship with a man when he was 18 but it only lasted a year as his partner became possessive. He then started another relationship with another man.

It was not until he was 24 when he was dumped by his third lover that Smith decided he was sick and tired of his lifestyle and decided that he’d rather be single than be used by men again. It was a lonely journey to recovery as he had to walk away from his friends and give up his lifestyle of frequenting gay clubs and saunas.

Meeting The Right Man

Brought up in a Roman Catholic home, Smith faithfully went to church even while he was practising the homosexual lifestyle. “I went to church every Sunday, but I never had a relationship with Jesus,” he says.

His turning point came when he met Jenny, his colleague at Salvation Army where he worked as a teacher. “One day, Jenny asked me, ‘Why don’t you give Jesus a try?’ I then decided to open up my heart and receive Christ into my life.”

Upon Jenny’s invitation, he started attending the Salvation Army Church and grew in his relationship with this Jesus.

Looking back, Smith realises that his “right man – Jesus” had always been by his side because when he was going through his third break-up, he happened to be at a place where he was surrounded by Christians.

“If not for Jesus and the support from fellow Christians, I would have gone back to my old lifestyle. The journey to recovery from sexual brokenness is not an easy one. You need a church or group who can listen to you and lift you up when you fall,” Smith says.

One of Smith’s greatest blessings is his wife, Amanda Amutha Perumal, who was his colleague and good friend at Salvation Army. In 1997, Smith and Amanda went to Singapore Bible College to further their studies and there, they got to know about Choices, a Singapore- based organisation which reaches out to homosexuals.

They were trained at Choices for their ministry with homosexuals and in 2003, they moved back to Malaysia and set up Real Love Ministry (RLM) in Malacca.

“I started the ministry with the goal of raising up Befrienders-trained RLM workers who will journey with homosexuals who want to leave their lifestyle. I also started giving talks on the issues of sexual brokenness and formed support groups,” says Smith.

Spreading The Love

In 2006, Edmund and Amanda felt God’s call to start a church in Malacca which they later named Real Love Fellowship. Today, Edmund is the Senior Pastor of the church, reaching out and spreading the love of Jesus to the sexually-broken and marginalised community. His church is attended by the young and old from all walks of life.

The proud father of two – Angel and Ethan – has a passion for the performing arts and still sings, acts and dances professionally. His album, Wake Up, was inspired from his years of community work with the mentally-challenged, AIDs patients and homosexuals. He also travels frequently as an itinerant speaker, sharing his testimony to many.

Seeing the huge need of the homosexual community, Smith says that his church is looking to doing more work among the community. “There are hundreds of homosexuals who want to come out, but we have only few Befrienders,” he says. “We need more people to step out to reach out to these people.”

The Smiths also hope to purchase their own building to cater to the increasing needs of their church members and ministry. More information on Real Love Ministry is available at www.r-l-m.com.

周慧敏的公公、香港多产作家倪匡：我为何弃佛信耶稣？

2014-06-15 邮报 阿摩司的训诲.

“我本来信佛教，但佛经太艰深，我太懒，受不了，”科幻小说作家倪匡在香港书展“卫斯理五十周年座谈会”上与书迷见面时，被问到为何弃佛信耶稣，他回答说，“基督教的《圣经》简单，只有一个字──便是‘信’，你信他就得！”

       倪匡这位与金庸、梁羽生并称“香港武侠三大家”的创作者所塑造的人物“卫斯理”早已深入许多武侠迷的心中。然而谈到信仰，倪匡确实毫无虚构，他坦诚地告诉书迷们：“你只要真的很虔诚地信，很由衷地信，没有半分勉强地信，必可以得到回应。”

       据香港基督教媒体报道，早年信佛的倪匡归信基督的经历也颇具传奇色彩。思考人生的意义未果，而借着基督徒梁上元向他传福音，他的心结逐渐解开最终受洗归入基督。而且，因着牧师祷告医治他多年的酒瘾后，他的信心更加坚定，多次在港台做见证。

       这位在武侠小说中把人物写活的“才子”曾经也遇过人生的低谷，因想不通人活着的目的甚至有过轻生的念头。“只知道不快乐，人生没有了活下去的意义，每一个明天都是今天的翻版，后天又是明天的翻版，”据福音站报道，倪匡曾经如是分享，“一眼可以看到底了，作为一个人，生活和昆虫一样，那有什么趣味？”

       然而，神听到了他的心声，藉着梁上元的基督教资料和开导，他慢慢地从迷茫和挣扎中看到“这真是真理”，心中的一个个疑问也渐渐解开，1986年复活节，他在台北一间教会受洗归入基督。

       不仅如此，神还以戒烟戒酒的奇迹祝福了他在主内的新生。倪匡在视频中见证说，一次跟牧师交流时，牧师鼓励还不怎么会祷告的他，想向神说什么大声念出来就可以；他说他真的很诚心地祷告说，“我酒瘾很痛苦，我又不想这样被酒控制一生……”就在当晚，他就不再恋酒了，他说这一神迹连自己都难以相信。

       年近八十的倪匡，家庭也十分蒙福。儿子倪震与其艺人妻子周慧敏在2010年也一同受洗归于基督。

       喜欢本文请转发:
http://mp.weixin.qq.com/s?__biz=MzA3OTM0MDYxOQ%3D%3D&mid=200266419&idx=1&sn=c17f8339263c83a5196a5c270a6f346e&scene=4#rd

How God Became Jesus—and How I Came to Faith in Him

Published by Christianity Today on 16 April 2014.

Bart Ehrman, a professor of religion at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, is something of a celebrity skeptic. He's written a number of bestsellers exposing the alleged errors in traditional accounts of early Christianity. His book Misquoting Jesus (2007) asserts that the manuscripts used to compile the New Testament are corrupted and unreliable, deviant from original autographs. His book Forged (2011) claims that many of the New Testament writings were counterfeits written pseudonymously under the names of the apostles.

In his latest book, How Jesus Became God: The Exaltation of a Jewish Preacher from Galilee, Ehrman argues that belief in Jesus' divinity evolved over the first few centuries and eventually crystallized into what we know today. Jesus didn't claim to be God; rather, his followers thought he was divine because they believed he rose from the dead. But even then, the understanding of Jesus' divinity was incredibly elastic, ranging from a man exalted to be God's vice-regent to a pre-existent person who was equal with God. Only much later was Jesus identified as the Almighty. You can read Ehrman's own summary of his book at The Huffington Post.

Ehrman has a famous de-conversion, turning from an evangelical Christian to an agnostic. And he loves to tell his story. Ehrman is a gifted communicator, never short of a provocative quote. He knows how to stir a crowd, and he does well in talk shows, conferences, presentations, and debates.

But I've got my own de-conversion story to match his.

From Skepticism to Faith

I grew up in a secular home in suburban Australia, where religion was categorically rejected—it was seen as a crutch, and people of faith were derided as morally deviant hypocrites. Rates for church attendance in Australia are some of the lowest in the Western world, and the country's political leaders feel no need to feign religious devotion. In fact, they think it's better to avoid religion altogether.

As a teenager, I wrote poetry mocking belief in God. My mother threw enough profanity at religious door knockers to make even a sailor blush.

Many years later, however, I read the New Testament for myself. The Jesus I encountered was far different from the deluded radical, even mythical character described to me. This Jesus—the Jesus of history—was real. He touched upon things that cut close to my heart, especially as I pondered the meaning of human existence. I was struck by the early church's testimony to Jesus: In Christ's death God has vanquished evil, and by his resurrection he has brought life and hope to all.

When I crossed from unbelief to belief, all the pieces suddenly began to fit together. I had always felt a strange unease about my disbelief. I had an acute suspicion that there might be something more, something transcendent, but I also knew that I was told not to think that. I "knew" that ethics were nothing more than aesthetics, a mere word game for things I liked and disliked. I felt conflicted when my heart ached over the injustice and cruelty in the world.

Faith grew from seeds of doubt, and I came upon a whole new world that, for the first time, actually made sense to me. To this day, I do not find faith stifling or constricting. Rather, faith has been liberating and transformative for me. It has opened a constellation of meaning, beauty, hope, and life that I had been indoctrinated to deny. And so began a lifelong quest to know, study, and teach about the one whom Christians called Lord.

As a biblical scholar with expertise in early Christian history, I spend most of my time teaching and writing about Jesus, the early church, and the development of Christian thought.

In many ways, I am the anti-type of Bart Ehrman—a biblical scholar with a university doctorate and a modest quiver of publications under my belt who has shifted from the secular to the sacred, transitioned from skepticism to faith. Consequently, I do not see Jesus as merely another man whom people later venerated as a god. No, when I look to Jesus, I see that God is with us and for us, because he became one of us. I believe that God became a man, Jesus of Nazareth.

Fighting for the Faith

When I heard Ehrman had a forthcoming book about how Jesus became God, my interest was piqued. I'm intimately familiar with Ehrman's earlier works—and I often enjoy them—so I had a pretty good idea where he was going with this topic.

I also knew that while Ehrman could be informative, his retelling of church history could also be wildly skewed in some places. So I teamed up with four colleagues (Craig Evans, Simon Gathercole, Chris Tilling, and Charles Hill), all leading authorities in their own fields, to publish an immediate response to Ehrman. We read Ehrman's manuscript over the winter and set out to write How God Became Jesus: The Real Origins of Belief in Jesus' Divine Nature. In this book, we challenge Ehrman on the when, where, how, and who of the origins of belief in Jesus as God incarnate.

For many secularists, Ehrman is a godsend who propagates common misconceptions about Jesus and the early church. He believes there was a spectrum of divinity between gods and humans in the ancient world. Therefore, he asserts that the early church's beliefs about Jesus evolved: from a man exalted to heaven to an angel who became human to a pre-existent "divine" person who became incarnate to a subordinated or lesser god to being declared one with God.

My faith and studies have led me to believe otherwise. First-century Jews and early Christians clearly demarcated God from all other reality, thus leading them to hold to a very strict monotheism. That said, Jesus was not seen as a Greek god like Zeus who trotted about earth or a human being who morphed into an angel at death. Rather, the first Christians redefined the concept of "one God" around the person and work of Jesus Christ. Not to mention the New Testament writers, especially Luke and Paul, consistently identify Jesus with the God of Israel.

Many people get the idea that Jesus was just a prophet and never claimed to be divine. But a careful look at the Gospels shows that the historical Jesus explicitly claimed to exercise divine prerogatives. He identified himself with God's activity in the world. He believed that in his own person, Israel's God was returning to Zion, just as the prophets had promised. And he claimed he would sit on God's throne. These claims, when studied up close, are de facto claims to divine personhood, the reasons religious leaders of the day were so outraged.

Evidence shows that Jesus claimed to be God incarnate, and within 20-some years after his death and resurrection, Christians were identifying him with the God of Israel, using the language and grammar of the Old Testament to do so.

Sure, some sects in the first few centuries held heretical beliefs about Jesus. But the mainstream, orthodox view of Christ's identity was always consistent with and rooted in the New Testament, though orthodox Christology became more refined in the following centuries.

Ehrman's book is genuinely informative and provocative in places, but he gets many things wrong. Modern secular audiences—who prefer provocative sound bites from Richard Dawkins and conspiracy theories from Dan Brown—love to hear Ehrman's message. He provides solace to secularists: the whole Jesus-is-God thing is a big mistake that has negatively affected human history. In our culture, unbelief is trendy and religion is passé; people of faith are often derided as superstitious yokels from the boonies.

Some have great confidence in skeptical scholarship, and I once did, perhaps more than anyone else. If anyone thinks they are assured in their unbelief, I was more committed: born of unbelieving parents, never baptized or dedicated; on scholarly credentials, a PhD from a secular university; as to zeal, mocking the church; as to ideological righteousness, totally radicalized. But whatever intellectual superiority I thought I had over Christians, I now count it as sheer ignorance. Indeed, I count everything in my former life as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing the historical Jesus who is also the risen Lord. For his sake, I have given up trying to be a hipster atheist. I consider that old chestnut pure filth, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a CV that will gain me tenure at an Ivy League school, but knowing that I've bound myself to Jesus—and where he is, there I shall also be.

The real story of Jesus Christ is good news, and it transformed my life. That's why I'm fighting to tell it amidst a cacophony of misguided voices.

Michael F. Bird is lecturer in theology at Ridley College in Melbourne and coauthor of How God Became Jesus: The Real Origins of Belief in Jesus' Divine Nature (Zondervan).

Link: http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2014/april-web-only/how-god-became-jesus-and-how-i-came-to-faith-in-him.html?paging=off

Wrongful Conversion: Who's Responsible?

In a heated online television discussion yesterday, three Muslim scholars were still agreed on one thing: that the use of the word “Allah” to describe gods of different religions – including the Christian god – is an issue only in Malaysia and nowhere else in the world.

But it still was an issue to two of the scholars as they argued there was an agenda behind Christians using Allah to refer to their god in Malay bibles.

"Christianity is said to be over 2,000 years old. They should have a big vocabulary bank to choose from to refer to God. The fact that they chose Allah was evidence that they have an agenda," argued Dr Khalif Muammar Harris, associate professor of the Center for Advanced Studies on Islam, Science and Civilization at Universiti Teknologi Malaysia.

Agreeing with him, another panellist echoed the refrain of some that Christians had used the word to mislead East Malaysians to convert them to Christianity. Making this point was Dr Yusri Mohamad, chairman of the Coalition of Supporters of Islam (Pembela), who wanted the word "Allah" banned in Malay bibles.

"It is a Christian virus in the country. They cannot be faulted for having their own missionaries, but they are propagating the virus of pluralism, that all religions are the same," he said.

Read more here:

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/malaysia/article/at-least-they-agreed-on-one-thing-only-in-malaysia-is-allah-an-issue

An illiterate Hindu woman has been converted to Islam without her knowledge and only found out through the National Registration Department (NRD).

Madinah Kanniammah Abdullah, 54, who lives in a rundown longhouse settlement in Kampung Bunga Raya, Subang, said she had never been a Muslim.

The mother of five told FMT that her problems started when she got into a relationship with an Indian national when she was a teen.

“I was 19 then and was in love with a man from India. He told me that he was Hindu and even prays in temples.

“We lived together for a week and that was when I found out he was a Muslim,” she said.

Madinah said her boyfriend took her identification card on the pretext of opening a bank account for her.

“But when he returned the IC I noticed that my name had been changed. When I asked him he said it was the correct spelling of my name in Malay,” she said.

Madinah found out later that her new IC indicated her as a Muslim, after a check with the NRD.

“I can’t read and write. So how could I possibly have signed any documents?” she asked.

She said she used thumbprints and could not recall signing any marriage documents with the Muslim man.

Years later, Madinah married a local Hindu in a customary wedding and started having problems when her first child was born.

Read more here:

http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/nation/2013/09/05/i-was-converted-to-islam-without-my-knowledge/

Many objected strongly when the government tabled the Administration of the Religion of Islam (Federal Territories) Bill 2013 late last month. The Bill allowed for the unilateral conversion to Islam of a child by one parent, presumably after that parent converts himself or herself to Islam. We are glad that these strong objections have caused the Bill to be withdrawn, for now.

Many have emphasised too that withdrawing the bill does not address the problem as existing state religious laws and the Bahasa Malaysia version of the Federal Constitution must be amended to ensure that the consent of both parents is necessary for a child’s conversion.

But unilateral conversion of the child is not the only issue to worry about when one spouse converts to Islam. In WAO’s direct experience with women whose husbands convert opportunistically, other rights of the non-converted women have been eroded.

If one spouse converts to Islam, the non-converted spouse and other non-Muslim next-of-kin are not entitled to inherit from the converted spouse. The Distribution Act 1958 does not apply to the estate of any person professing Islam, and non-Muslims are generally not allowed to inherit under faraid principles of asset distribution.

Non-Muslim family members can only receive at most one-third of the converted person’s estate, if the converted person chooses to bequeath anything at all. The Distribution Act 1958 should be amended to safeguard the right of the deceased’s non-Muslim next-of-kin to inherit.

Read more here:

http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/opinion/2013/07/29/rights-of-non-converted-spouse-must-be-upheld/

The High Court here has ruled as “null and void” the conversion of three Hindu children of kindergarten teacher, M.Indira Ghandi to become Muslims. Judicial Commissioner Lee Swee Seng also ruled that the father of the children, Mohd Ridzuan Abdullah, had not followed the rules in converting his children, Tevi Darsiny, 16; Karan Dinish, 15; and Prasana Diksa, five, to Islam.

“Under the Perak Islamic Administration Enactment, the three children must have the intention to embrace Islam without force. In this case, the three children cannot be proved to have recited the syahadah (affirmation of faith) and they, as well as their mother, were not present at the Islamic Religious Office for the conversion purposes,” he said when delivering his judgment which lasted one hour and 40 minutes.

Lee said the conversion was null and void as the children were not present to recite the syahadah before the religious officer. He said the decision was made not to ensure victory for any quarter, but more to maintain racial harmony in the country.

Read more here:

http://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/nation/2013/07/26/conversion-was-%E2%80%9Cnull-and-void%E2%80%9D-says-court/

My Train Wreck Conversion

Published by Christianity Today on 7 February 2013.

As a professor of English and women's studies, on the track to becoming a tenured radical, I cared about morality, justice, and compassion. Fervent for the worldviews of Freud, Hegel, Marx, and Darwin, I strove to stand with the disempowered. I valued morality. And I probably could have stomached Jesus and his band of warriors if it weren't for how other cultural forces buttressed the Christian Right. Pat Robertson's quip from the 1992 Republican National Convention pushed me over the edge: "Feminism," he sneered, "encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become lesbians." Indeed. The surround sound of Christian dogma comingling with Republican politics demanded my attention.

After my tenure book was published, I used my post to advance the understandable allegiances of a leftist lesbian professor. My life was happy, meaningful, and full. My partner and I shared many vital interests: aids activism, children's health and literacy, Golden Retriever rescue, our Unitarian Universalist church, to name a few. Even if you believed the ghost stories promulgated by Robertson and his ilk, it was hard to argue that my partner and I were anything but good citizens and caregivers. The GLBT community values hospitality and applies it with skill, sacrifice, and integrity.

I began researching the Religious Right and their politics of hatred against queers like me. To do this, I would need to read the one book that had, in my estimation, gotten so many people off track: the Bible. While on the lookout for some Bible scholar to aid me in my research, I launched my first attack on the unholy trinity of Jesus, Republican politics, and patriarchy, in the form of an article in the local newspaper about Promise Keepers. It was 1997.

The article generated many rejoinders, so many that I kept a Xerox box on each side of my desk: one for hate mail, one for fan mail. But one letter I received defied my filing system. It was from the pastor of the Syracuse Reformed Presbyterian Church. It was a kind and inquiring letter. Ken Smith encouraged me to explore the kind of questions I admire: How did you arrive at your interpretations? How do you know you are right? Do you believe in God? Ken didn't argue with my article; rather, he asked me to defend the presuppositions that undergirded it. I didn't know how to respond to it, so I threw it away.

Later that night, I fished it out of the recycling bin and put it back on my desk, where it stared at me for a week, confronting me with the worldview divide that demanded a response. As a postmodern intellectual, I operated from a historical materialist worldview, but Christianity is a supernatural worldview. Ken's letter punctured the integrity of my research project without him knowing it.

With the letter, Ken initiated two years of bringing the church to me, a heathen. Oh, I had seen my share of Bible verses on placards at Gay Pride marches. That Christians who mocked me on Gay Pride Day were happy that I and everyone I loved were going to hell was clear as blue sky. That is not what Ken did. He did not mock. He engaged. So when his letter invited me to get together for dinner, I accepted. My motives at the time were straightforward: Surely this will be good for my research.

Something else happened. Ken and his wife, Floy, and I became friends. They entered my world. They met my friends. We did book exchanges. We talked openly about sexuality and politics. They did not act as if such conversations were polluting them. They did not treat me like a blank slate. When we ate together, Ken prayed in a way I had never heard before. His prayers were intimate. Vulnerable. He repented of his sin in front of me. He thanked God for all things. Ken's God was holy and firm, yet full of mercy. And because Ken and Floy did not invite me to church, I knew it was safe to be friends.

I started reading the Bible. I read the way a glutton devours. I read it many times that first year in multiple translations. At a dinner gathering my partner and I were hosting, my transgendered friend J cornered me in the kitchen. She put her large hand over mine. "This Bible reading is changing you, Rosaria," she warned.

With tremors, I whispered, "J, what if it is true? What if Jesus is a real and risen Lord? What if we are all in trouble?"

J exhaled deeply. "Rosaria," she said, "I was a Presbyterian minister for 15 years. I prayed that God would heal me, but he didn't. If you want, I will pray for you."

I continued reading the Bible, all the while fighting the idea that it was inspired. But the Bible got to be bigger inside me than I. It overflowed into my world. I fought against it with all my might. Then, one Sunday morning, I rose from the bed of my lesbian lover, and an hour later sat in a pew at the Syracuse Reformed Presbyterian Church. Conspicuous with my butch haircut, I reminded myself that I came to meet God, not fit in. The image that came in like waves, of me and everyone I loved suffering in hell, vomited into my consciousness and gripped me in its teeth.

I fought with everything I had.

I did not want this.

I did not ask for this.

I counted the costs. And I did not like the math on the other side of the equal sign.

But God's promises rolled in like sets of waves into my world. One Lord's Day, Ken preached on John 7:17: "If anyone wills to do [God's] will, he shall know concerning the doctrine" (NKJV). This verse exposed the quicksand in which my feet were stuck. I was a thinker. I was paid to read books and write about them. I expected that in all areas of life, understanding came beforeobedience. And I wanted God to show me, on my terms, why homosexuality was a sin. I wanted to be the judge, not one being judged.

But the verse promised understanding after obedience. I wrestled with the question: Did I really want to understand homosexuality from God's point of view, or did I just want to argue with him? I prayed that night that God would give me the willingness to obey before I understood. I prayed long into the unfolding of day. When I looked in the mirror, I looked the same. But when I looked into my heart through the lens of the Bible, I wondered, Am I a lesbian, or has this all been a case of mistaken identity? If Jesus could split the world asunder, divide marrow from soul, could he make my true identity prevail? Who am I? Who will God have me to be?

Then, one ordinary day, I came to Jesus, openhanded and naked. In this war of worldviews, Ken was there. Floy was there. The church that had been praying for me for years was there. Jesus triumphed. And I was a broken mess. Conversion was a train wreck. I did not want to lose everything that I loved. But the voice of God sang a sanguine love song in the rubble of my world. I weakly believed that if Jesus could conquer death, he could make right my world. I drank, tentatively at first, then passionately, of the solace of the Holy Spirit. I rested in private peace, then community, and today in the shelter of a covenant family, where one calls me "wife" and many call me "mother."

I have not forgotten the blood Jesus surrendered for this life.

And my former life lurks in the edges of my heart, shiny and still like a knife.

Rosaria Champagne Butterfield is the author of The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert (Crown & Covenant). She lives with her family in Durham, North Carolina, where her husband pastors the First Reformed Presbyterian Church of Durham.

Read more here:

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2013/january-february/my-train-wreck-conversion.html?paging=off

BN woos anti-Christian votes

Datuk Seri Najib Razak has expressed support for the appeal to overturn a High Court ruling which allows the use of the Arabic term “Allah” for God by non-Muslim groups in Malaysia, according to an interview with global news station Al Jazeera.

The caretaker prime minister also told Al Jazeera English’s Veronica Pedrosa in the interview, to be aired tomorrow, that he did not intend to have a public election debate with Opposition Leader Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim before the May 5 polls.

“The concept of Allah is different in the Muslim sense than in the Christian sense, we should not upset the Muslims and Muslims should not upset the Christians, we are living in harmony for years and it should continue,” he was quoted as saying in an excerpt distributed by Al Jazeera English.

The Court of Appeal has fixed May 30 for another case management on the government and Home Ministry’s appeal against the 2009 High Court decision that the word “Allah” can be used by the Catholic weekly newspaper Herald.

In 2007, the government limited the usage of the term to the Muslim context only. This was revoked by the High Court two years later as the judge said the law was unconstitutional. Putrajaya appealed the ruling and the short-lived implementation of the 2009 court verdict has since been suspended.

After the ruling, there was a series of firebombing and stones thrown at several houses of worship in Kuala Lumpur. Some of the culprits were charged and later punished but the case continues to rankle.

Read more here: 

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/malaysia/article/najib-defends-allah-ban-rules-out-election-debate

With the Perkasa duo, Ibrahim Ali and Zulkifli Noordin, entering the fray as Umno-sponsored parliamentary candidates, racism and religious bigotry are set to rear their ugly heads again especially over the “Allah” controversy.

A manifestation of such extremism is the extent to which fringe Malay groups like Perkasa would go to advance their agenda. Cause for concern is their incendiary speeches over the controversy of the use of the word “Allah” to refer to God by non-Muslims. Ibrahim even suggested recently an open season for burning bibles (pesta membakar Alkitab). Nothing can be more seditious and incendiary. Yet this was tolerated by the authorities...

The “Allah” controversy is more than just a word. It is about freedom of religion and about unreasonable government policies and laws that seek to place non-Muslims under the scope of Islamic enactments and jurisdiction.

Two-thirds of the church in Malaysia is made up of Bumiputera Christians in Sabah and Sarawak who use the Alkitab which contains the word “Allah” to refer to God. They view the prohibition on the use of the “Allah” word and restricted use of the Alkitab as infringing on their freedom of religion.

Read more here:

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/sideviews/article/allah-is-more-than-just-a-word-bob-teoh/

Before the Sarawak state election in 2011, he came up with a 10-point formula to resolve the issue of shipments of Malay-language bibles, to cater to Bumiputera Christians, that were blocked and confiscated before they were subsequently released by the government.

The report also said that in the 10-point resolution, the Cabinet, through its minister Datuk Seri Idris Jala, assured the sizeable Bumiputera Christian population in Sabah and Sarawak that they were free to bring in and use their bibles in Malay as well as in indigenous languages.

And today, Jala apparently declined to comment when asked about Najib’s latest backing for the appeal against the High Court ruling. So, when BN needed the Christian vote before the Sarawak polls, they got Jala to come out with the 10-point resolution but today the minister plays dumb. Maybe this isn’t part of your KPI, minister?

Read more here:

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/sideviews/article/bns-wavering-stand-on-allah-felix-ong/

Christians will not stop calling their God “Allah” even if the courts stop them from doing so in Muslim-majority Malaysia, says UPKO president Tan Sri Bernard Dompok, whose party is part of the ruling Barisan Nasional coalition government...

The Christian community forms about a quarter of Sabah’s population and almost half of Sarawak’s population, where they mainly worship in Bahasa Malaysia church services and read Malay-language bibles.

Read more here:

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/malaysia/article/christians-to-continue-using-allah-despite-government-appeal-says-dompok

Malaysia Prime Minister Najib's Pious Platitudes

Written by  Bob Teoh. Original title: "Christmas card to the Prime Minister of Malaysia". Published by Malaysia Chronicle on 25 December 2012.

Yuletide greetings of peace, love, and blessings.

Notwithstanding the crucifix controversy during the Christmas reception for you by the Christian community last year, you have decided to join their celebrations this year again. This reflects boldness and courage on your part, Sir.

This augurs well for peace and harmony in the country. It goes without saying that we in Malaysia, continue to enjoy good inter-faith relations despite efforts of incendiary bigots in our midst to destroy it. Alhamdulillah, such heinous acts are but in vain as the Lord God Almighty is indeed sovereign over our beloved homeland. Hallelujah.

You fondly recall your meeting with Pope Benedict XVI last year, and that Malaysia has formally established diplomatic relations with the Vatican City. As pointed out by you, “another step forward came last week as the government announced that it will ensure that any Malaysian Christian who wishes to travel to Jerusalem for a pilgrimage is able to do so.” This reflects the gentle face of Islam surely.

You also pointed out in your Christmas blog, “… since becoming Prime Minister I have placed a lot of emphasis on the unifying concepts of 1Malaysia and the Global Movement of the Moderates. These concepts are partly about establishing a dialogue, which is important, but I am also determined that they lead to real action too.”

I am also encouraged that you would, “…have the pleasure of taking part in a tea party with members of the Christian community to mark Christmas and listen to their views.”

Unfortunately, Sir, I would not be at the Christmas reception today as I am away from the country. Allow me to air my views by way of this Christmas card to you and I trust I will have your ear. Surely you are unlike the guy from Pahang who wants to cut off his ears and throw them into the Pahang River, probably polluting it in the process. Silly man, that one.

The Orang Asli Slapping Case – Kelantan

It’s already over two months since a teacher at SK Bihai near Gua Musang in Kelantan had allegedly slapped four Orang Asli non-Muslim students, aged between 12 and 14, on 23 October because they had failed to recite the Muslim doa over lunch at their school. They may be non-Muslims but they this is not the way to treat bumiputras like them. Sir, your 1Malaysia unifying concepts compels you to act with urgency. Indeed, Islam must be seen as a tolerant religion.

Conversion to Islam of an under-age Iban schoolboy - Sarawak

You may not know it yet Prime Minister but a top Iban Catholic student of Kolej Datu Patinggi Abang Haji Abdillah or the prestigious residential Mara junior college in Kuching, was recently converted to Islam. This occurred just before his SPM exams without his parents’ knowledge or permission. He comes from a very remote village.

This is not an isolated case as church leaders there will tell you that this has been going on for a very long time as part of the Umno-BN Islamisation strategy in Sarawak and Sabah. Sir, you have two options. This first is to kill the rumour if indeed it turns out to be one. This does not take much effort or time to determine this matter one way or another.

If indeed the conversion did take place, then the school need to explain how an under-age conversion can be allowed to take in its premises without his parents’ consent or knowledge.

There are no two ways about it, Sir. You have to act fast and quick to assure the Christian community especially that of the Malay speaking bumiputra Christians of Sarawak and Sabah that your 1Malaysia is exactly what it means. No backdoor conversion, please.

Under-age conversion of four Christian students in FT Labuan

Recently, four under-age bumiputra Christian students, one Catholic and three Protestants, at a government residential school in the Federal Territory of Labuan island were converted to Islam. The conversion allegedly took place during a school activity. Local pastors have taken the matter up to the school but it had denied the activity was organised by the school.

A comprehensive report has been compiled by church leaders there to be handed to the Sabah state government. But Labuan is a Federal Territory and as Jakim, or the Islamic Development Department, is parked under your nose in the Prime Minister’s Office, it is within your power to intervene and act immediately to resolve the dispute without damaging religious harmony further. All you need to do is ask to see the voluminous report. And act on it. We have had enough of cow stealing but in this case, no more stealing sheep from the Good Shepherd please.

MyKad Islamisation of bumiputra Christians

Sir, you are already familiar with this case as it was discussed by your Cabinet just recently. Indeed, you had asked two Christian Cabinet ministers, one from Sabah and the other from Sarawak, to act on the complaint immediately. But what has happened? Nothing as usual.

Does this mean that the National Registration Department can ignore Cabinet directives? The complaint is that bumiputra Christians in Sabah (and Sarawak) have been classified by the NRD as Muslims automatically when issuing them their MyKad simply on the basis that they have “bin” and “binti” in their names.  The NRD has refused to rectify their errors. Instead it has asked complainants to go to the Syariah courts to get an order saying that they are Christians and indeed not Muslims. How more ludicrous can your administration get? Sir, if you mean what you say, then give the two federal minsters a kick in their butts and while at it make sure one lands on the bum of the NRD chief too. Can be done Sir, just execute the famous Bruce Lee one-leg-three- kicks.

The Allah word and the Alkitab

It has been three long years since the Kuala Lumpur High Court ruled on 31 Jan 2009 in favour of  Herald, the Catholic Weekly, that even though Islam is the religion of the Federation, this does not empower the government to prohibit the use of the word Allah by others. It also found that the word Allah was not exclusive to Muslims.

But your administration has appealed against it. The Court of Appeal is out on a stroll and not in any hurry to hear it. This is a travesty of justice. As Prime Minster you should not allow a useless judicial traffic cop to erect illegal road blocks to justice. The Titular Roman Catholic Archbishop of Kuala Lumpur was the one who sued your administration and won. I wonder what you will say to him when you meet him at today’s tea party?

In closing, dear Prime Minister, my hope and prayer is that Umno’s Islamisation agenda will reflect moderation and not turn out to be worse than PAS’s proposed hudud as what your friends in MCA are claiming.

Link: 

http://www.malaysia-chronicle.com/index.php?option=com_k2&view=item&id=45627:christmas-card-to-the-prime-minister-of-malaysia&Itemid=2

Related reports:
http://www.malaysiakini.com/news/217426?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

Catholic Bishop Dr Paul Tan Chee Ing described Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak's remarks at a hi-tea hosted by the Christian Federation of Malaysia (CFM) yesterday as "pious platitudes we are used to hearing on these occasions".

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/mobile/malaysia/article/i-am-pm-for-all-najib-tells-christians
Datuk Seri Najib Razak today reassured the Christian community in Malaysia that his government has not forgotten them despite growing feelings that they are being sidelined. The prime minister appeared to placate the community by praising the contributions of Christians in Malaysia, especially the role played by mission schools in raising the bar in education.

“I do not want to be a prime minister for only a particular section of the community. I’m a prime minister for all Malaysians, and I’ve said that repeatedly,” Najib reminded a Christian crowd at a Christmas party here. Najib cited the recent lift of a ban for Christian pilgrimage to Jerusalem as proof that the government recognises Christians as essential to the nation. “I believe that a God-fearing Christian, with strong values, would be good for Malaysia,” he added. Najib also called for Christian leaders to continue engaging in dialogue and to engage the government constructively.

CS Lewis to be honoured in Poets' Corner

Published by BBC News on 22 November 2012.

A memorial stone to writer and scholar CS Lewis is to be placed in Poets' Corner in Westminster Abbey in 2013. A service will take place on 22 November 2013 to mark the 50th anniversary of his death. Lewis will join such greats as John Keats, William Blake and TS Eliot in a tradition going back 600 years.

Vernon White, Canon Theologian at Westminster Abbey, said Lewis was an "extraordinarily imaginative and rigorous thinker and writer". Lewis, he continued, "was able to convey the Christian faith in a way that made it both credible and attractive to a wide range of people". The author, he said, had "had an enduring and growing influence in our national life".

Lewis (1898-1963) is best remembered for writing The Chronicles of Narnia, a series of books that has sold more than 100 million copies worldwide. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, the first instalment in the saga, was published in 1950 and has been adapted since for stage, TV and film.

Other works by the Belfast-born novelist, essayist and literary critic include The Screwtape Letters, The Space Trilogy and the non-fiction titles Mere Christianity and Miracles. 

Former poet laureate Ted Hughes was the most recent writer to be commemorated at the Abbey with a posthumous memorial stone. His memorial was unveiled by Seamus Heaney at a service held in December last year.

Link: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-20426778#TWEET383477

Exploitation Of Religion For Political Gain [Part 1]

By BOB TEOH. Published by MySinChew on 4 November 2012.

Bumiputra Christians in Sabah continue to be "converted to Islam" by the National Registration Department (NRD) simply because they have "bin" and "binti" in their names. Sabah churches are seeking urgent solutions to the crisis but none seems to be in sight.

The NRD has made it clear it would continue to list bumiputra Christians in Sabah as Muslims as long as they are known by bin or binti. It would also not rectify past entry errors by way of changing the religion listing back to Christianity in the identity cards (MyKad) of those affected. The NRD would only act upon an order by a Syariah High Court to determine whether those bumiputra Christians whom it had listed as Muslims are not Muslims indeed.

Even if these native Christians get a hearing from the Syariah Court, both the NRD and Islamic authorities may not turn up, thus causing unnecessary delays. A current test case has been mounted by a 53 year-old widow and her two adult daughters and supported by the respective local churches. All three are from the Dusun Banggi tribe.

Intim binti Lambatan, was born in 1959 in Banggi, the northernmost island in Sabah. Her husband died 20 years ago. She was officially baptised in her church, the Sidang Injil Borneo (SIB) in Limbuak Darat, in Kudat on mainland Sabah seven years ago and issued a Baptism Certificate.

The SIB is the biggest indigenous protestant church in Sabah. Her elder daughter, Norina binti Nuhudan,28, was baptised when she was 15 while her younger daughter, Listin Nuhudan, 22, was baptised when she was 14. Both are also SIB members.

When all three had their religion wrongly classified as "Islam" in their MyKad, they brought the matter up to their pastors. A Christian lawyer from another SIB church in Kota Kinabalu agreed to take up their case but the lawyer had to engage a Muslim counsel to act on their behalf in the Syariah High Court.

In March last year a Christian lawyer, Victoria Jayaseele Martin, was barred from practising in a Syariah court despite having a Diploma in Syariah Law and Practice from the International Islamic University Malaysia, in addition to a University of London law degree.

The test case was initiated several months ago when Intim went to the Kudat office of the Jabatan Hal Ehwal Agama Islam Negeri Sabah – JHEAINS - or the Sabah Islamic Affairs Department, to clarify the status of her religion.

On 25 July, the department wrote to the Syariah Court in Kudat to say that Intim's name is not on record in their Pendaftaran Pengislaman (Islamisation Register).

With JHEAINS's clarification, she made a statutory declaration at the Kudat Magistrate Court stating that she is not a Muslim and that her name is not on the Islamic department's register. She said she was not originally a Muslim but when she applied for her identity card, the word "Islam" was wrongly recorded on it.

But still the NRD would not rectify its error and issue her a new identity card with her correct status as a Christian. It looks like it is Intim's responsibility to first go to the Kudat Syariah High Court for a declaration that she is not a Muslim.

This she did by filing a case against the Ketua Pendafter Muallaf (Chief Registrar of New Believers) of Sabah on 14 August. The Director General of the NRD was cited as the second respondent. She is asking for her status as a Muslim to be deleted from her identity card.

The Kudat Syariah High Court then wrote back to the Islamic Department to investigate further whether Intim is a Muslim on their register. The mention date was twice postponed to last Monday (28 Oct). But both the respondents did not turn up, thus causing more delays.

The problem has long reached a crisis in Sabah when SIB churches could not marry their members as some are found to be "Muslims" in their MyKad and the Registrar of Marriages would not recognise such marriages.

Two years ago, the National Evangelical Christian Fellowship (NECF), of which SIB is a member, met the NRD Director General and his senior officers. NECF was assured that the problem could easily be resolved be those affected filing in what it called a "Borang A" to change the status of their religion.

The NECF was happy with that assurance and posted an advisory on its website: "Fuss-free way to change religion data in MyKad." "Christians who wish to change their religion to Christianity in their MyKad data are not required to tender any legal documents, such as baptism certificates. They only need to fill in 'Borang A' to effect the change," NECF then said.

"This was confirmed at a recent meeting between NECF Malaysia and top officials from the National Registration Department (NRD)." But NECF itself pointed out the catch. "This is not applicable if they had been registered as Muslims."

NECF said, at the meeting with NRD officials, it also raised the issue of East Malaysian Christians whose religion in their MyKad is recorded as "Islam" simply because their names carry "bin" and "binti".

"This is a prevailing problem in Sabah and Sarawak where many indigenous citizens have names that carry bin and binti". The NRD automatically assigns their religion as ‘Islam' even though many of them are Christians," according to NECF.

NECF also said the NRD confirmed that those who are affected could change the data in their MyKad provided they had obtained clearance from the Syariah Court. It looks like NECF had bought a dud – the Borang A assurance by the NRD is just a ruse to continue its "Islamisation" by deception in Sabah.

Link: http://www.mysinchew.com/node/79423?tid=12